Dear Women,
First of all, we're sorry. We're sorry
that although we look like men, we often act like boys. We're not even sure
what it means to be men anymore. As we grow up, we learn that to be happy is to
be self-indulgent and self-centered. We try to make enough money so that we can
have the right TV with the right video games in the right home. We want to date
you and maybe even marry you but we are scared to focus on someone else instead
of ourselves. Isn't it sad that we see committing to you as a potential threat
to our happiness instead of a wonderful opportunity?
Here's what we don't understand: True
happiness comes from being true men. We think and act like boys who don't want
their toys taken away. We look up to "role models" in the media who
teach us to get as much gratification out of life as possible. We may claim to
be spiritual, or even firm atheists, but pleasure is the god
that we worship, whether we realize it or not. Unfortunately, women tend to be
just another part of our hedonistic lifestyle. Please know this: True men won't
treat you like an irritating obstacle or a sexual convenience.
A real man understands that women are
to be cherished and treated with care and honor. He sees marriage as the
opportunity to be a real-life superhero—he leaves behind his old identity and
becomes a new person, dedicated to serving his wife and children. Although he
will struggle at first, a true man who marries eventually understands that he
can't fit through the narrow doorway to happiness if he tries to carry all of
his toys with him. There is just enough room for him and his wife, arm in arm,
committed to their marriage.
Women, you can help us become real men!
Most importantly, we want to feel admired by you. Help us to know that you love
us just as we are, even if there is room for improvement. Do this by giving us
words of validation; praise us for the things we do well. This means more to us
than we let on.
In return, we will make sure that you
feel loved and cherished by us. We will learn to talk with you so you can be
heard and understood, not so that we can tell you how to solve your problems.
We'll also try to learn to express how we feel without withdrawing or getting
angry. With polished communication we can learn that what makes you happy makes
us happy too! What a concept!
Once again, we're sorry. We are to
blame, even though good male role models are hard to find these days. We've
ignored our calling to become true men and instead act like we're in high
school for as long as we can. Please trust that we are capable of more than
this.
If you are frustrated with the man in
your life, do your best to forgive him and start fresh. After a while, if it's
clear that he will not become a real man, leave him. You deserve better.
A healthy relationship will make
everyone involved feel happy. When we are happy, we are capable of living
meaningful and fulfilling lives alongside one another. Thank you for your
understanding and patience as we journey onward to find happiness and become
real men.
Sincerely,
Men
Men

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