Although I have learnt to appreciate my hourglass figure, there
are lots of downsides to being large and in charge, and ultimately very few
rewards come with it. Naturally busty women will tell you that being
well-endowed is no walk in the park. Sure many women claim that they would kill
for a bigger bust. That doesn't mean that double D cups don't have their
drawbacks. In fact, more often than not, naturally busty women would love to
have the tables turned. Since that is practically impossible to do without
surgery,
Here are some of the worst side-effects of being busty:
1.
Back/Neck
Pain
I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that most
women who have higher than a C cup wouldn’t wish it on their worst enemy. Sure,
they’re nice to look at and they fill out a sweater something fierce, but at
the cost of a gnarled spine and permanent shoulder-strap indentions? No thanks.
2.
Nothing
Fits Correctly!
Okay, I can maybe overlook the lack
of cute bras in big sizes (unless you want to pay double at a specialty store),
although it’s pretty disheartening to go lingerie shopping, find several
adorable bras right away, and then place them back on the rack before heading
over to the “big girl” section, which is invariably filled with seven shades of
nude and beige and resemble something a ’50s housewife would wear. I made my
peace with this a long time ago.
So I have to spend a little extra to
find non-heinous bras in my size. I can live with that. What really sucks, however, is trying to find
clothing which not only fits correctly, but flatters a figure that is big on
top and little in the middle. Forget about button-down shirts of any kind,
because there will always be one infuriating button in the middle that refuses
to get with the program and creates a huge, unsightly gap which shows that
lovely beige bra.
Also, if you fit your breasts, the rest of the garment
will be big and tent-like. If you wear anything remotely form-fitting in order
to better flatter your figure, you are either given unwelcome wolf-whistles by
male passerby or “Who does she think she is?” stares by other women. Lesson?
You can’t win. Just buy a potato sack and be done with it.
3.
Crumbs
In The Cleavage
This is honestly self explanator. If you are eating in
public, you have two options: leave them there, where they will get itchy, or
attempt to casually shake them out of your bra. This is not easy to do, and you
will wind up drawing attention to yourself either way.
4.
YOU
CAN NEVER GO WITHOUT A BRA
This is perhaps my strongest argument for why busty
ladies get the short end of the stick. We can only imagine being able to run
out to the store for a quick errand without throwing on one of these despicable
things. In reality, it’s just not feasible. I suppose there are a few women
among us who think it’s acceptable, but honestly, they are in the minority
here. If I’m expecting to be around other people, I have a bra on, and that just
sucks.
BRIGHT SIDE OF BEING BUSTY
1.
A German study, published in the New
England Journal of Medicine, concludes that staring at women’s breasts for a
few minutes daily is better for men’s health than going to the gym.“Just 10
minutes of looking at the charms of well-endowed females is equivalent to a
30-minute aerobics work-out,” said author Dr Karen Weatherby, an expert on ageing.
The research team, led by Dr Weatherby, spent five years monitoring the effects
of this unique discovery.The men who were told to stare at bosoms daily had
lower blood pressure and slower resting pulse rates and also decreased their
risk of coronary artery disease. Dr Weatherby explained: “Sexual excitement
gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation. “There’s no question -
gazing at large breasts makes men healthier.” She also recommends that men over
40 should spend at least 10 minutes daily admiring breasts sized D-cup or
larger.
2.
You will never have to run unless you want to.
Even the avid busty runner won't run without a sports bra. For the
busty woman, there is a time and a place for running, which always includes a
sturdy sports bra. Any deviations from your running routine mean that you and
your bust are exempt. For the busty woman, a spontaneous game of tag just
doesn't exist, unless you want it to, in which case you can just hold your arms
over your chest. Otherwise, yelling "Sorry, but I didn't bring my sports
bra" usually makes for a great excuse.
3.
Whenever weighing yourself, you can always subtract at least 2
pounds for your breasts. For those of you who care about the number on the scale, this is a
true bonus. Not only can you subtract pounds for clothing and shoes, but you
can also subtract pounds for your bust, making that number look even more
appealing. “WINK WINK”
4.
Having big breasts now better prepares you for pregnancy.
One of the biggest things newly pregnant women notice are their
steadily increasing breasts. For some of them, a larger chest is a blessing.
For most, however, they will readily admit how frustrating a big bust can be.
Since you are a specialist in the busty department, this particular pregnancy
nuisance isn't as much of an adjustment for you. The A cup to D cup jump is
certainly a big one. For the busty woman, however, moving further up the
alphabet is an easy transition.
5.
You never have to be self conscious about anything else.
With all eyes on your bust, you will never have to worry about
your other "flaws". No one's looking at them. Instead of letting the
perpetual gazes annoy you, look on the bright side.
6.
Your partner loves them.
It's an obvious one, I know, but still very important. No matter
how much you hate your breasts, your partner loves them. It doesn't make the
fact that you can't run around bra less any easier to handle, but it does mean
that every once in a while, you might actually see your breasts through your
partners eyes. It is then that your "burden" will seem just a little
higher and a little firmer and all of a sudden, your bust will seem less of a
curse and more of a blessing.
EMBRACE THOSE BOSOMS GIRLS!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment