CKN is the same journalist who visited Chris Okotie's church and
came back with the Queen Esther pageant gist. The same guy visited Tunde
Bakare's church and said one or two things. Well, he is a journalist, but it
seems the dude loves visiting 'happening' churches.
COZA...The name sef sounds like one
of those “short time” joints. .I mean, how will someone name his Church
COZA?..COZA, if doubled, sounds coza coza (sharp sharp). But that is not the
issue; COZA has been in the news of late for the wrong reasons. Just like Kris
Okotie’s Household of God’s Church, a particular Pastor in the
Federal Capital Territory Abuja is also hitting the headlines. His Church has
become a beehive of activities, attracting all the fine babes and
upwardly mobile young men in Abuja.
Commonwealth of Zion Assembly (What a
name) is located right in the Central Area of Abuja.
It is directly behind Nanet Suites .To
be specific, the worship centre is at the Thisday Dome, owned by Media guru
Nduka Obiagbena of Thisday Newspaper.
Recently the General overseer of the
Church was involved a sexual scandal involving him and one of his
“lovely sister” sorry i mean Church member.
The lady went on all cylinders to
portray the “man of God” as a randy man who goes after anything on skirt.
Infact she said, the Pastor has tasted the “ozone layer” of
practically all the babes in the Church.
Pastor Biodun as he is
referred to is a smooth lovely young man in his 40s.His uniqueness and American
style mode of worship is attracting the young and mighty in Abuja
like ants after sugar.
Recently, he was said to have also
acquired a Rolls Royce like his counterpart at Oregun.
With all these in mind, I made up my
mind to hit COZA today for a worship of a lifetime.
My first disappointment on arriving
Thisday Dome,COZA place of worship was that they have no parking space.
No vehicle was allowed about 500
meters to the gate. All vehicles were parked far away from the Church. The road
leading to the Church was barricaded by five different vehicles.
Stationed at the beginning of the
road were some fully armed soldiers and some other plain cloth security men.
At the entrance to the compound
proper was a bomb scanning machine (just like the ones at the airports or
banks)..You were expected to empty all metals with you including car
keys,phones and Ipads etc.
After walking through the scanning
machine, you now walk into the main hall of Thisday Dome, where you are
welcomed by some of the most beautiful babes I have seen in Abuja. They
were all dressed in pink or is it yellow short gowns .a
They have a smile for everyone, well
chosen, spotless skin. Their smiles were infectious just like that lady in the
Maclean television commercial.
I fancied one immediately, i clicked
her an eye contact and she responded, but there were so many 'distracters' on
ground that prevented me from going for the kill, but i marked her down, i will
be back i told myself.
I wanted her to usher me inside the
Church by herself but one overzealous one that didn’t catch my fancy jumped in
front of me, wanting to shake my hands, but i ignored her and moved on.
The Church was already in full session
when i arrived, it was testimony time. I met the last testimony by a lady who
spoke about how she was healed after several months of illness.
And as is customary with me, within a
second, i scanned the entire seats and made for one empty one beside one
beautiful dame.
The usher wanted to move me somewhere
else and i refused.
The lady naturally beckoned on me to
join her..Smart babe i said to myself again..Haa, these COZA babes sabi catch
man jare. I gave her a long smile which she replied with one of the best set of
teeth i have ever seen in a long time.
Babes dey Coza abeg, with these
type of ladies, why won’t Pastor Biodun fall a victim. Their looks
can seduce any holy creature. They were beautiful, smart, friendly,
open handed, receptive and ready to compromise.
I settled down quickly and joined the
flow of songs and clapping.
As we sat down, i saw the lady,
who i now realized was wearing a very very short mini skirt, was trying to
use a white handkerchief to cover her open laps which she noticed i was glaring
at continuously. She must have noticed that my gaze could penetrate a fully
clothed body.
When she couldn’t stand it any longer,
she politely asked me why i was gazing at her laps.
I told her there was no need covering
such a lovely body with handkerchief, moreso since she has decided to come to
church half covered, what’s the essence of covering them.
She smiled and told me - that what’s in
vogue. That i am a bush man...
'Wowww, in vogue?' I asked her?..'Does Pastor Biodun
support these type of dressing?!' i asked her. She saidPastor Biodun has
nothing against any mode of dressing once you are comfortable with it.
I asked her if she was
comfortable with what she was wearing and she said yes. i then went for the
kill - 'removeyour handkerchief then and lets enjoy God’s creation'. She didn’t
know what to say.
She asked me if i was a first timer to
the Church and i said YES..Her smile broadens again and she let go the cover
cloth.
COZA is a very beautiful Church. The
choir made of both young men and women was awesome. They sang like kenery, the
stage was well lighted. The hall was filled to capacity with an overflow.
I was looking out for the
controversial Pastor but he was nowhere to be found..The Church is on
a 12 days prayer and fasting.
All the female workers in the Church
were well selected, a true reflection of what the lady that accused the Pastorof
Sexual harassment once stated.
Their skirts were short but not
too revealing. At a point, i was now asking myself why these modern day Pastors
take so much delight in going for young female Church members. How come Pastor Kris
Okotie and Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo find these damsels very attractive
that they easily forget the words of God.
How come they take so much
delight in having canal knowledge of the daughters of eve even if it means
ruining their callings.
COZA is not the best of place
to be, because the temptation is just too much. It seems all the beautiful
babes in Abuja converged in that place to seek for things i don’t know.
When it was time for Sermon, a young
man mounted the stage.
My disappointment was now complete,
it's obvious today is not going to be my day.
He went on to announce that the Senior Pastor was
not around for service today but that he will be back in the days ahead. He
went ahead to preach on prosperity and joy of giving.
According to him, Ecclesiates
Chapter 10:19 stated that “Money Answereth Everything”, that with money you can
get all the good things of life including cars, women etc..No wonder his Senior Pastor is
in the news for the wrong reasons i muted.
He went on “this year all those of you
that are looking for the fruits of the womb will become pregnant..All those who
were into relationship last year will get married this year. All those that
were disappointed in business will smile this year. blablabla.
The preaching was the same. The
audience was the difference.
I was told Pastor Biodun is a
powerful dresser..He loves cars and women to pieces. He is also very generous.
According to the lady that sat beside me, there is no way you will meet Pastor without
melting and “falling for him” even if he doesn’t toast you. The guy fine die,
she stated.
After service, i left quickly to look
for that babe at the entrance.
She was waiting for me already. I
told her that as a new convert to the Church, i will need more personal home
preaching to convince me to continue coming to Church.
She was more than happy to oblige
me. We exchanged numbers, to meet at our Chicken Nkwobi joint later
this evening.
I look forward to that wonderful home bible
study. I want to learn a thing or two or even try those stunts that PastorBiodun
Fatoyinbo is noted for with his female Church members.
Who knows, i may be in for a good
time in the presence of the Lord via COZA in the days and weeks ahead.
But I will not rest until i meet Pastor
Biodun one on one. Till then, i rest my case.
CKN
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