Jiah
Khan’s suicide note – which was found a few days after she took her life at her
apartment in Juhu – has been revealed.
According to DNA, Jiah’s mother Rabiya found the
six-page letter in her wallet box when she was searching for poems written by
the late actress to be read out at her prayer meet held on Sunday.
The letter – which does not mention anybody’s name –
reads as follows:
“I don’t know how to say this to you but I might as
well now as I have nothing to lose. I’ve already lost everything. If you’re
reading this I might have already left or about to leave. I am broken inside.
You may not have known this but you affected me deeply to a point where I lost
myself in loving you. Yet you tortured me every day.
These days I see no light I wake up not wanting to
wake up. There was a time I saw my life with you, a future with you. But you
shattered my dreams. I feel dead inside. I’ve never given so much of myself to
someone or cared so much. You returned my love with cheating and lies. It
didn’t matter how many gifts I gave you or how beautiful I looked for you.
I was scared of getting pregnant but I gave myself
completely the pain you have caused me everyday has destroyed every bit of me,
destroyed my soul. I can’t eat or sleep or think or function. I am running away
from everything. The career is not even worth it anymore.
When I first met you I was driven, ambitious and
disciplined. Then I fell for you, a love I thought would bring out the best in
me. I don’t know why destiny brought us together. After all the pain, the rape,
the abuse, the torture I have seen previously I didn’t deserve this.
I didn’t see any love or commitment from you. I just
became increasingly scared that you would hurt me mentally or physically. Your
life was about partying and women. Mine was you and my work. If I stay here I
will crave you and miss you.
So I am kissing my 10-year career and dreams goodbye.
I never told you but I received a message about you. About you cheating on me.
I chose to ignore it, decided to trust you. You embarrassed me. I never went
out, I never went with anyone else. I am a loyal person. I never met anyone
with Karthik I just wanted you to feel how you make me feel constantly.
No other woman will give you as much as I did or love
you as much as I did. I can write that in my blood. Things were looking up for
me here, but is it worth it when you constantly feel the pain of heartbreak
when the person you love wants to abuse you or threatens o hit you or cheats on
you telling other girls they are beautiful or throws you out of their house
when you have no where to go and you’ve come to them out of love or when they
lie to your face or they make you chase after them in their car.
Or disrespects their family. You never even met my
sister. I bought your sister presents. You tore my soul. I have no reason to
breathe anymore. All I wanted was love. I did everything for you. I was working
for us. But you were never my partner. My future is destroyed my happiness
snatched away from me.
I always wished the best for you, was ready to invest
what little money I had in your betterment. You never appreciated my love,
Kicked me in the face. I have no confidence or self esteem left, whatever
talent whatever ambition you took it all away. You destroyed my life. It hurt
me so much that I waited for you for ten days and you didn’t bother buying me
something.
The Goa trip was my birthday present but even after
you cheated I still spent on you. I aborted our baby when it hurt me deeply.
You destroyed my Christmas and my birthday dinner when I came back. When I
tried my hardest to make your birthday special. You chose to be away from me on
Valentines Day. You promised me once we made it to one year we would get
engaged. All you want in life is partying, your women and your selfish motives.
All I wanted was you and my happiness you took both
away from me. I spent money on you selflessly you would throw in my face. When
I would cry for you. I have nothing left in this world to live for after this.
I wish you had loved me like I loved you.
- ZeeNews
2 comments:
why?becos of man?rubbish.
REALLY SAD...........
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